I told my physical health to F**K OFF yesterday because I felt somewhat normal, my mental health needed me to move and I did, got some of the housework done. Because you spend a lot of time with your mental side when the physical pain stops the body. After a while your head can get kind of abusive towards yourself, you should be doing that! Why can’t you do this? It’s like a complete separation between what the disease does and what your mind thinks, is it because our eyes cant see it? or because we feel it and we’re ignored and discounted by most? I and surely most folks were taught to not be lazy and get things done, it’s not a bad thing really unless you end up with AI disease. Then your stuck on that mindset and your body is stopped in its tracks, the two don’t jive really. Anyways I was having a hard time with my thoughts lately and pain that won’t simmer down. Then yesterday I had one of those few days when you wake up and feel ‘different’ and that difference is you feel like a person again opposed to a tortured voodoo doll. I jumped on it, tidied the livingroom, rec room, loaded dishwasher and did and folded 4 huge loads of laundry! I knew I’d pay for it later but didn’t care, I feel good and happy with myself again. I know I shouldnt feel guilty about not being able to, but I’m too much like my Mom 🙂 Woke up with pain at a 3 that morning by evening it was a 5 and that’s a good day for a rheumy.