We were never warned about this…

Was doing some thinking this weekend, and on Sunday I had a major meltdown because of overusing my noggin. I had been feeling depressed and stressed out from lack of sleep, pain & taking meds that nearly always make me feel nauseous. It all came to a head on the weekend, all of the loss I’d ever experienced came crashing in, it was too much. No one tells you when you’re young the amount of loss you will experience and that things will never stay the same and life is continually changing. No one prepares you for the challenges a chronic health issue that develops later on in life. Your friends and family step back, unsure of how to deal with your chronic illness and your near constant pain. Every once in a while, the disease, stress and nights of no sleep pile up and overwhelm you. I’m sure I’m not the only spoonie who experiences this 😦 In other words I had a good cry on Sunday, I needed it. I’ve also been dealing with depression because of my ‘bad genes’, I had my first child at 18 and my 2nd at 19. I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis at 37 and of course I had no idea of this condition as a teenager. Lately my daughter has been complaining about her bad skin which I also had as a teenager but never thought my kids with experience such a bad case of it although it wasn’t as bad as I had experienced. Trust me that is something I would not have wanted passed down to my kids. The thought of them getting rheumatoid arthritis scares me to death, it is much much worse than acne. Even though right now a few zits feels like the end of the world, its nothing compared to RA and I pray to God that they never have to experience any autoimmune disease ever.

It’s strange to think that crying your eyes out could bring such release from stress. If you’re lucky enough to have somebody to talk to understand this disease, hold on to them. But if you need a good cry go ahead and do it, it purges the stress out of your body. Between the confusion, brain fog, pain and not knowing what’s going to hurt when you wake up each day, releasing that pain by crying is nothing to be ashamed about.

Here’s hoping that the warmer weather relieves some of your pain and brightens your day.


3 thoughts on “We were never warned about this…

  1. mkupl79 says:

    I know how you feel, and I swear I was writing something similar to you as you were writing your blog…about passing this down to the kids. My kids were gone with the grandparents this weekend, and I too let it all out. It started out with a tear or two then a flood that wouldn’t stop. I can feel another one coming on all too soon…

  2. Lucy says:

    Hey Stace,

    I wanted to get in touch because I think you might be interested in an interactive web page we are currently working on to raise awareness for RA.

    Because it is Arthritis Care Awareness Week very soon (13-19 May), I believe this would go really well on your blog, and be of great interest to your readers.

    Our infographic will be visible on a web page which we will share with you once completed.

    We have a teaser snippet of the infographic to give you a first viewing so let us know if you want us to send that over! You are more than welcome to embed this on your website as well. We hope you help us in raising awareness for RA and spread the word!

    Let me know if you would like any more information. I look forward to hearing from you.

    Kind regards,


Comments are closed.