5 years & holiday reminder

I can’t believe it’s been five years since I first signed onto WordPress!

With the holidays coming up I wanted to offer support for anyone who deals with a chronic disease. December is brutal, too often when we are told to enjoy what we have. More often than not we’re reminded of what we don’t have. Our health is a biggie here, missing family and friends who are no longer living is another. Some families just don’t get along too. Add all of that on top of media/society pressure to have the perfect Christmas, to spend money you don’t have and there’s a recipe for a crushing disappointment.

I’m at a point in life where the people make the holiday for me. My kids especially. I refuse to be pressured and I let folks know if they’re headed that way. I use to bake tons and went all out with cheesy Christmas decorating. Now it’s a much simpler approach, the easier the better. For so many years I made the holiday, now I want to just enjoy the moment.

If you are chronically ill, sick and in pain, cut yourself some slack. It’s stressful for people who aren’t sick. Rest often, if help is offered take it. I cannot shop alone anymore, bags get heavy fast.

Think about the meaning more than the money.

Do something you enjoy if your heart is hurting.

Most of all be gentle on yourself.

Happy holidays


RIP Mandy 2002-2015

Posted from WordPress for Android

End of summer 2015

It’s been a heck of a year so far. Recently I noticed that I can no longer stand on my right leg on its own. It gives out. I’m having to modify how I walk and move again, also stopping yet more activities. I’m not managing disease progression well, I get use to how things are then they change again. Pain levels are getting higher too. I’m not feelin this.

Went to a farmers market today and nearly tripped backwards over someones loose toddler. Yesterday it was a 3 seater stroller & loose baby. I’m becoming all too aware why you don’t see lots of disabled folks out and about. The world is a minefield of disasters that are nearly missed. Also, turning babies and toddlers loose in a crowded area is rude and thoughtless. Why should I have to watch out for unsupervised children? I told one woman off yesterday, you can’t watch your kids. Keep them home!

Between that and just rude people in general I stay home most times. I’m intolerant of the ignorance of others and tend to say something. Tired of the stupid looks and staring. I’m disabled, get over it.

Posted from WordPress for Android


I haven’t been writing much obviously. But a few things this past holiday season made a-ha moment in my brain. If you ever have the chance (or misfortune in my case) to hear a random bunch of people talk about what they REALLY think about the sick and chronically ill. In this instance they didn’t know I have RA/fibro. You really get a disgusting eye opener. I had no idea that my life was such a crushing tax burden on the world. How the sick have ‘lots of resources’ and how the gov’t will pay for everything the sick need.


It’s people like you who are the reason I try to desguise my limp and make no mention of being on disability. Let alone the shitload of poison meds I take to try to control it. The medications fuck up other parts of my body by the way. Not just my RA. There was no issue with the gov’t taxing my ass off when I was well. So go fornicate yourselves and leave the sick alone.

No one who’s chronically ill WANTS to be.


Warning, this is a big ole rant because it sucks being poor & chronically ill

May is finally here and (gimp fingers crossed) it shouldn’t snow anymore, at least until October anyway. Yesterday I found an article on people living in Alberta, Canada living on disability and how they get by, most don’t. Too many stories about people having to choose to eat or pay electric bill, quite a few go without eating and I am one of them. Disability was raised in 2011, but now it’s 2013 and the cost of living has skyrocketed since 2011. My rent was increased yesterday by a landlord who a) does not give a damn about the conditions of his property b) had no problem with known criminals living on his property and causing us the unfortunate next door peeps (we live in a duplex) extreme stress. I am VERY glad that the provincial sheriff stepped in and made him throw out the last bunch of crooks, because he would have let them live there until they were 3 months behind on rent. I’ve lived here since December of 2010 and up until this past February had to deal with psychotic drunks and drug dealing among other things on the other side of the wall from us. I stayed here through all that because moving was too much money and I cannot afford it, but now since our rent was increased I’m mad as hell, this is the thanks we get for scrounging to come up with rent every month. I can tell you Rick S, that there is a special place in hell for a¬†slumlord like you, while you rotate on you thumb polishing your porshe suv deciding when you should go on vacation next, you make my family, my Mother especially, SICK. Here I am trying to make my house look nice and not slummy while asshole neighbours would fall over, drunk or high, on my flowerbeds and yard decor. We mow the grass, I’m not keen on 18″ high lawns, but you don’t care do you?? You are a true Piece of Shit Rick S, I’m not usually the sort for Schadenfreude¬†but well, how much garbage is a person supposed to take? I’m glad you’ve lost MONTHS of rent due to your complete carelessness and all the court crap you have to pay for to get money out of the low life scum you had no problem with letting live here and causing problems 24/7. I have no pity or sympathy, you asked for it and Karma delivered and it will again. I’m on disability myself and see my standard of living dropping with each passing month, the utilities here are insanely high and eating healthy?? Not possible, and since I’m not a fan of crap/fast food I’d rather not eat and leave whats good for my daughter who still lives with me. I’ve had to ask her to chip in too even though I’d rather not, financial hell is what I’m in at the moment and I have no other choice than to downgrade pretty much anything I do, it’s easy to go up a standard of living but going down is a fresh new version of hell. I hate the tar sands and what it’s done to my city, I will more than likely be forced out of the city I’ve grown up in because of the damn oil fields and assholes looking to make a buck. Not all of us work in the oil industry and cannot afford the high cost of living like a rig pig can.

My featured image is our jerry rigged back gate, so we’re able to keep it closed and our dogs don’t get out!!

I am grateful my RA meds are covered, they’re my breakfast, lunch and dinner.